Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
The person who i admire is different from time to time.
When i was young boy,i wanted to be a soldier.
We have lots of great general soldier from long long time ago.
Especially we have a great navy general soldier.his name is soon sin lee.he beated the japan about 500 years ago. For example he had just a small number of ships to fight against the japaness navy.but japan had a many numbers of ships at least 10 times than he had.but he won.anyway he never lost to japan.
When i became a adult,i admired the persons who fight against government to get a democracy.
Finally they won and we have been living peaceful and freedom. But i don\'t think it is now.this government has lots of matters. I think this government makes our democracy back to 30 years ago.
I hope that we are gonna swich from old government to new one at the next election day.
강사 첨삭
Hi there, Mr. [이름]!^^
Thank you for expressing your ideas through writing.
Please keep improving your skills.
Keep it up!
~Kelly^^
The person who i admire is different from time to time.
>> The person I admire changes from time to time.
When i was young boy,i wanted to be a soldier.
When i was young boy,i wanted to be a soldier.
>> When I was a young boy, I wanted to be a soldier.
We have lots of great general soldier from long long time ago.
We have lots of great general soldier from long long time ago.
>> We had lots of great soldiers in general from long time ago.
Especially we have a great navy general soldier. his name is soon sin lee.
Especially we have a great navy general soldier. his name is soon sin lee.
>> Especially in the navy, we had a great soldier who was a general. His name is Soon Sin Lee.
he beated the japan about 500 years ago.
>> He defeated Japan about 500 years ago.
For example he had just a small number of ships to fight against the japaness navy.
>> For example, he had just a small number of ships to fight against the Japanese navy.
but japan had a many numbers of ships at least 10 times than he had.
>> But Japan had ships 10 times more than what he had.
but he won.
>> But he won.
anyway he never lost to japan.
>> Anyway, he never lost to Japan.
When i became a adult,i admired the persons who fight against government to get a democracy.
When i became a adult,i admired the persons who fight against government to get a democracy.
>> When I became an adult, I admired people who fight against the government for democracy.
Finally they won and we have been living peaceful and freedom.
Finally they won and we have been living peaceful and freedom.
>> Finally, they won and we have been living in peace and freedom.
But i don\'t think it is now.
>> But I don\'t feel that way now.
this government has lots of matters.
>> This government has lots of issues.
I think this government makes our democracy back to 30 years ago.
>> I think this government makes us feel like we are living 30 years ago.
I hope that we are gonna swich from old government to new one at the next election day.
I hope that we are gonna swich from old government to new one at the next election day.
>> I hope that we can have a new government on the next election day.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.