Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
Good afternoon, Donna!
I had a tough Monday morning.
One of my important staff had a serious stomachache, thus I had to let her go to the hospital and see a doctor of internal medicine dept.
Fortunately or not, there are not so many patients in our clinic this morning.
I am afraid that there will be more clients this afternoon, and many of them won\'t be satisfied with our services for lacking of staffs.
However, I believe time always solve the problem.
Now this is my homework.
I love my family the most in the world.
And I always want my family to be happy.
So I try to show them how much I love them every moments.
Furthermore I try to squeeze having more time together in everyday.
Meanwhile, sometimes I am so busy or exhausted, thus I can\'t spend enough time with my family.
In those situation, my wife understand me well and she always tell our daughters how much I love them and why I can\'t play with them.What a lovely wife!
I am sure that my family loves each other.
Good day,Take care!
강사 첨삭
Good afternoon, Dr. [이름]!
I hope you ate well inspite of what happened early this Monday. Last week, someone resigned and it was not quite easy for you. This week is a new challenge. You are right, time will reveal answers to your porblems. I wish your staff would feel better and to be able to report for her duties tomorrow. I hope too that you can cope with the stress today and for the entire week.
Well, understanding, forgiveness, patience, trust, selflessness, among the many other qualitites are needed in maintaining a harmonious and balanced relationships within the family. After all, family is forever. At times, finding a common time is impossible but making short moments unforgettable are even better. Thus, you are a role model to your children of how a parent should be as well as the perfect husband to your lovely and understanding wife.
A job well done on your homework answer! Your sentences were very smooth because of the use of appropriate transition words. The sentence constructions were not convoluted, hence, the message was on point.
Catch you soon!
-T. Donna~
>> Correct!
I had a tough Monday morning.
>> Correct!
One of my important staff had a serious stomachache, thus I had to let her go to the hospital and see a doctor of internal medicine dept.
>> Correct!
Or: One of my important staff had a serious stomachache, thus I had to let her go to the hospital and see a doctor of the internal medicine dept.
Fortunately or not, there are not so many patients in our clinic this morning.
>> Correct!
Or: Fortunately, there are not so many patients in our clinic this morning.
I am afraid that there will be more clients this afternoon, and many of them won\'t be satisfied with our services for lacking of staffs.
>> I am afraid that there will be more clients this afternoon, and many of them won\'t be satisfied with our services for lacking staff.
However, I believe time always solve the problem.
>> However, I believe time always solves the problem.
Now this is my homework.
>> Correct!
I love my family the most in the world.
>> Correct!
And I always want my family to be happy.
>> And, I always want my family to be happy.
So I try to show them how much I love them every moments.
>> So, I try to show them how much I love them every moment.
Furthermore I try to squeeze having more time together in everyday.
>> Furthermore, I try to squeeze in having more time together everyday.
Meanwhile, sometimes I am so busy or exhausted, thus I can\'t spend enough time with my family.
>> Correct!
In those situation, my wife understand me well and she always tell our daughters how much I love them and why I can\'t play with them.What a lovely wife!
>> In those situation, my wife understands me well and she always tells our daughters how much I love them and why I can\'t play with them.What a lovely wife!
I am sure that my family loves each other.
>> I am sure that my family loves ane another .
Good day,Take care!
>> Good day, take care.
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