Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
Hello, T.Donna.
It was a hectic day.
In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
However, there were many things that I should concern about.
First, many staff made many mistakes.
Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
Of course, the profit for today was not good.
These situation made me upset.
However, there was also good things.
After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
Sauna really relaxed me so much.
The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
Tomorrow is my day off.
See you.
강사 첨삭
Hi there, Dr. [이름]!
As Dr. [Name] goes for a day off, expect that your tasks may be doubled. Nonetheless, your staff is right there to support you. However, if you still have to tell them in detail what they need to do accurately, that can be so tough. Then, constant reminders are a must.
Sometimes, when it rains, it pours. One problem arises after another. When the staff are not doing well, the scanner breaks, and so on. Luckily, at the end of the day, you have very good friends who can ease your weariness through a hearty meal, sauna, and a brand new car!
Therefore, I can see that your life is still in perfect balance. You are truly fortunate no matter what happens.
So, read my grammar suggestions on prepositions, verb tenses, the use of \'a\' and \'the\', among others. Overall, your composition displays complexity and clarity as well as breath and depth of ideas. Excellent job!
See you later!
-T. Donna~
>> Correct!
It was a hectic day.
>> Correct!
In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
>> Correct!
Or: In fact, there were only few patients/clients in the clinic.
However, there were many things that I should concern about.
>> However, there were many things that I should be concerned about.
First, many staff made many mistakes.
>> Correct!
Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
>> Correct!
Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
>> Third, the scanner of the compound machine was broken.
And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
>> Correct!
Of course, the profit for today was not good.
>> Correct!
These situation made me upset.
>> These situations made me upset.
However, there was also good things.
However, there was also good things.
>> However, there were also good things.
After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
>> Correct!
Or: After the work, I attended a conference which was held in a good hotel near my house.
I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
>> Correct!
That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
>> Correct!
Or: That dinner was amazing and it was composed of steak, grilled prawn, caviar, and cake.
Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
>> Correct!
Sauna really relaxed me so much.
>> Correct!
The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
>> Correct!
His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
>> His car looked so great, so that I applauded it.
Tomorrow is my day off.
Tomorrow is my day off.
>> Correct!
See you.
>> Correct!
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