homework

2025-07-10 · 첨삭 강사 Shay

학생이 쓴 원문

When I was 18, I loved boy group \"BTOB\". And they held on their concert in winter season. My friend\'s friend, in other word, an acquaintance got two tickets and looked for a person who goes with her. She already knew that I loved BTOB and she suggested me to go to the concert. I really hoped to go there, but I thought it was very important period to study and I didn\'t have confidence to persuade my parents. So I gave up to go there and just waited next concert after entering a university. But there were no concert after entering a university because one of members went to the military. I really regretted those choice in that time.

강사 첨삭

Hi, Megan^^
Thank you for sharing.
You must\'ve felt really bad. 
It was like the only chance you had to attend their concert. 
_T. SHAY^^
***
When I was 18, I loved boy group \"BTOB\". 
>>When I was 18, I loved the boy group \"BTOB\". 
And they held on their concert in winter season. 
>>And they held their concert during the winter season. 
My friend\'s friend, in other words an acquaintance got two tickets and looked for a person who goes with her. 
>>My friend\'s friend--in other words, an acquaintance--got two tickets and was looking for a person to go with her. 
She already knew that I loved BTOB and she suggested me to go to the concert. 
>>She already knew that I loved BTOB, and she suggested that I go to the concert. 
I really hoped to go there, but I thought it was very important period to study and I didn\'t have confidence to persuade my parents. 
>>I really wanted to go, but I thought it was an important time to study, and I didn\'t have the confidence to persuade my parents.
OR: Although I really hoped to go, I felt it was too important a time to study and wasn\'t confident about persuading my parents. 
So I gave up to go there and just waited next concert after entering a university. 
>>So I gave up on going there and just waited for the next concert after entering the university.
But there were no concert after entering a university because one of members went to the military. 
>>But there were no concerts after entering the university because one of members went to the military. 
I really regretted those choice in that time.
>>I really regretted that choice at that time.

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