homework
학생이 쓴 원문
I love to take various trips abroad, because I think it is good chance to experience the culture of a country in a short period.
Also, memories can stack up with the people I went there with.
Among my international trips, I remember my trip to Nha Thrang with my best friend Jimin.
We went there in summer, but actually it wasn\'t as hot as I expected.
Every morning we went to the gym, and after workout, we ran along the beach road.
Jimin and I both love to exercise, so we were great travel mates.
In the afternoon, we swam in the pool and also at the beach.
I can\'t forget the taste of beer after swimming so passionately.
Also, mango in Vietnam\'s are very cheap and sweet so we ate them everyday for five-day stay.
That became our routine before going to sleep.
It was a [이름]derful experience with my best friend, also it was my first time traveling abroad with a friend after becoming an adult.
강사 첨삭
Hello there, Ji[이름]!
This answer is personal, thus, has all the perfect elements of an answer for OPIc Part 2!
The details are systematically arranged and the series of events were transitioned properly. Perhaps there are a few parts that can be squeezed in to make it to the time limit.
Invest in a pattern like this in all of your answers and your score is going to be a very good one.
Excellent job! See you later.
-T. Donna~
Also, memories can stack up with the people I went there with.
>> I love to take various trips abroad, because I think it is a good chance to experience the culture of a country in a short period.
Also, memories can stack up/ last with the people I went there with.
Among my international trips, I remember my trip to Nha Thrang with my best friend Jimin.
We went there in summer, but actually it wasn\'t as hot as I expected.
Every morning we went to the gym, and after workout, we ran along the beach road.
Jimin and I both love to exercise, so we were great travel mates.
In the afternoon, we swam in the pool and also at the beach.
I can\'t forget the taste of beer after swimming so passionately.
Also, mango in Vietnam\'s are very cheap and sweet so we ate them everyday for five-day stay.
That became our routine before going to sleep.
Also, memories can stack up/ last with the people I went there with.
Among my international trips, I remember my trip to Nha Thrang with my best friend Jimin.
We went there in summer, but actually it wasn\'t as hot as I expected.
Every morning we went to the gym, and after workout, we ran along the beach road.
Jimin and I both love to exercise, so we were great travel mates.
In the afternoon, we swam in the pool and also at the beach.
I can\'t forget the taste of beer after swimming so passionately.
Also, mango in Vietnam\'s are very cheap and sweet so we ate them everyday for five-day stay.
That became our routine before going to sleep.
>> Among my international trips, I remember my trip to Nha Thrang with my best friend Jimin.
We went there in summer, but actually it wasn\'t as hot as I expected.Every morning we went to the gym, and after workout, we ran along the beach side/ the shore.
Jimin and I both love to exercise, so we were great travel mates.
In the afternoon, we swam in the pool and also at the beach.
I can\'t forget the taste of beer after swimming so passionately.
Also, mangoes in Vietnam are very cheap and sweet so we ate them everyday for five days.
That became our routine before going to sleep.
It was a [이름]derful experience with my best friend, also it was my first time traveling abroad with a friend after becoming an adult.
>> It was a [이름]derful experience with my best friend, also it was my first time traveling abroad with a friend after becoming an adult.
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