Homework#20
학생이 쓴 원문
Good moring, Joylin! It was your birthday in 4,Sep. Did you have a great day? I hope so.
HW#20 In what ways does discrimination affect one\'s social behavior?
I think discrimiantion makes people have no desire. For example, they want to be successful in their company or business.
But, if they have different skin color, gender and places where they were born, some companies or contries take away many chances from them.
They would be depressed and think like that \"It\'s no use trying anything\". So, sometimes they would behave deviant things.
I read a book about this topic. There is an famous escaped prisoner in korea. when he got arrested, he said that \"there is a way that a man like me can\'t be born. If the teacher had said you were a good boy, I wouldn\'t have gone this far.\"
His teacher and his friends discriminate him because of the reason why he was just poor.
강사 첨삭
Hi Jonathan!
Thank you so much. I had a great birthday, the best day of all... I guess.
I ate a lot and people sent gifts in my name. It was nice to know that many people like me and care for me.
I think I am surrounded with amazing friends and admirers.
I\'m 23 now and I\'m ready to face responsibilities ahead. Honestly, I\'m scared with some reasons but I hope to be courageous as time goes on.
Anyway, here are my corrections.
I think discrimiantion makes people have no desire. For example, they want to be successful in their company or business.
>>I think discrimination makes people lose desire. For example, they want to be successful in their company or business.
But, if they have different skin color, gender and places where they were born, some companies or contries take away many chances from them.
>>But, if they have a different skin color, gender, and birth place, some companies or countries take away many chances from them.
They would be depressed and think like that \"It\'s no use trying anything\". So, sometimes they would behave deviant things.
>>They would be depressed and think that \"It\'s no use of trying anything.\" So, sometimes they would behave in deviant ways.
I read a book about this topic. There is an famous escaped prisoner in korea. when he got arrested, he said that \"there is a way that a man like me can\'t be born. If the teacher had said you were a good boy, I wouldn\'t have gone this far.\"
>>I read a book about this topic. There was a famous escaped prisoner in Korea. When he got arrested, he said that \" There is a way that a man like me can\'t be born. If the teacher had said I were a good boy, I wouldn\'t have gone this far.\"
His teacher and his friends discriminate him because of the reason why he was just poor.
>>His teacher and his friends discriminated him because of the reason that he was just poor.
I like your quotation. I was moved by it. Thanks for sharing.
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