homework

2012-10-22 · 첨삭 강사 Marie

학생이 쓴 원문

Television has destroyed communication among friends and family. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. I can't agree 100% both sides. When I was middle school student, my friend saw a korean movie 'Friend'. This movie includes swear word and violence. Anyway, after one of my friends changed his character. One day, My teacher saw him who is smoking. And teacher scolded friend. But He didn't reflect his fault. He was offended with teacher. And he went out school. He didn't return school. He has not come back to school. But I think that everybody see the same movie, everybody feel the same think. Another friend who saw the same movie was diffrent. Therefore, I can't agree 100% both sides.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]ho! You did an awesome job in expressing your thoughts here.  I know that Korean movie! I watched it too.  Anyway, is this a true story or did you just make it up again? Hehe.  It\'s very interesting. Please review some corrections I made below. Always check your spelling, capitalization and don\'t forget to use articles (a, an, the). Have a [이름]derful evening. CIAO! ~Teacher Marie~I can\'t agree 100% both sides. >> I can\'t agree 100% on both sides.When I was middle school student, my friend saw a korean movie \'Friend\'. >> CORRECT OR >> When I was a middle school student, my friend saw a Korean movie entitled \"Friend\".This movie includes swear word and violence. >> CORRECT OR >> This movie had swear words and violence in it.Anyway, after one of my friends changed his character.>> Anyway, after watching that, one of my friends suddenly changed his character/personality.One day, My teacher saw him who is smoking. >> One day, my teacher saw him smoking.And teacher scolded friend. >> The teacher scolded my friend. But He didn\'t reflect his fault. >> But he didn\'t reflect on his fault. OR >> But he didn\'t reflect on his bad actions.He was offended with teacher. >> He was offended by what the teacher did. And he went out school. >> He went out of school after that. OR >> He left school after that.He didn\'t return school. >> He didn\'t return to school. He has not come back to school. >> He never came back to school.But I think that everybody see the same movie, everybody feel the same think. >> But I think that everyone who saw the movie would feel and think the same way. Another friend who saw the same movie was diffrent. >> Another friend of mine who also saw the movie thought differently though.Therefore, I can\'t agree 100% both sides. >> Therefore, I can\'t agree 100% on both sides.

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