homework :>
학생이 쓴 원문
Why do you think your sister enjoys going to museums and art galleries?
-> Her personality is quite a different than me. I like to meet many friends at the same time and have fun with them in noisy and crowded places, but she loves to stay in quiet and calm places because when she is in the places, she feels warm and would feel like getting some fresh energy. Otherwise, She hates some noisy and crowded places such as bar or club. That's why she enjoys going to museums and art galleries where the calm mind comes.
강사 첨삭
Hi there! Thank you for sharing. :)
I can tell the difference.
Please see the corrected sentences and let me know if all your ideas are aligned.
See ya,
T.Kristel
Why do you think your sister enjoys going to museums and art galleries?-> Her personality is quite a different than me.
>> Her personality is quite different than mine.
I like to meet many friends at the same time and have fun with them in noisy and crowded places, but she loves to stay in quiet and calm places because when she is in the places, she feels warm and would feel like getting some fresh energy.
>> I like to meet many friends and have fun at noisy and crowded places while she loves to in quiet and calm places because when she is in crowded places, she would need to get some fresh air since she\'d feel warm.
Otherwise, She hates some noisy and crowded places such as bar or club.
>> Moreover, she hates noisy and crowded places such as bars or clubs.
That\'s why she enjoys going to museums and art galleries where the calm mind comes.
>> That\'s why she enjoys going to museums and art galleries where she can calm her mind.
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