Homework 5/23
학생이 쓴 원문
강사 첨삭
Hello Allen.
This is for the first part of the essay.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
Living in the world where people enjoy various activities have strongly destroyed our nature.
>> Living in a world where people enjoy various activities has strongly destroyed our nature.
This change, in my opinion, seems significant enough to affect negatively to human again.
>> This change, in my opinion, seems significant enough to affect humans in a negative way.
This essay will study more examples of the problems, followed by some feasible and approachable solutions to each one of them.
>> This essay will study more examples of the problems, followed by some feasible solutions to each one of them.
One of the distressing issues we can expect or even witness easily around us is unpredictable weather.
>> Correct
Pollution made by us might generate great natural disasters as much as it can destroy our lives.
>> Correct
In addition, another problem from rising sea levels is more serious.
>> In addition, another problem from rising sea levels is getting more serious.
The critical phenomenon can submerged many low-lying areas that have cultural, natural and economic values.
>> The critical phenomenon can submerge many low-lying areas that have cultural, natural and economic value.
These problems would be able to generate other serious problems so that we need wide range of solutions.
>> These problems would cause other serious problems so we need a wide range of alternative solutions.
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