homework
학생이 쓴 원문
*ESSAY: Businesses should hire employees for their entire lives. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
I am opposed to the opinion.
Businesses want to hire people who have the ability to work well.
Businesses pay the monthly salary for employees'efforts and according to the principle employees have to give their abilities for Businesses.
This is a reasonable exchange between businesses and employees.
Therefore, Businesses have the rights to select the talented person.
All of the employees have to try not to fall behind in the competition, and Businesses should encourage them to upgrade their skills and support them.
If it is done smoothly, I think we don’t have to consider if Businesses should hire employees for their entire lives or not.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]! ^.^
Happy Wednesday! ^^
I think businesses should hire employees for their entire lives.
However, if the workers don\'t really feel they are improving or getting better at their present work, they should find another job.
Another remedy is to tell their bosses about their problem, and their companies should do something about it.
In case of your reasoning, you have expressed your opinion very well.
I strongly agree that businesses and their employees should give something for an exchange.
Both factors must satisfy each other.
Anyway, good job for your composition! ^^
See you! ^^
... Teacher Paula ... ^.~
>> CORRECT!
>> OR: I oppose to the statement.
Businesses want to hire people who have the ability to work well.
>> CORRECT!
>> CORRECT!
Businesses pay the monthly salary for employees\'efforts and according to the principle employees have to give their abilities for Businesses.
>> Businesses pay the monthly salary for employees\' efforts and according to the principles employees have to give their abilities for the companies.
>> Businesses pay the monthly salary for employees\' efforts and according to the principles employees have to give their abilities for the companies.
>> OR: Businesses pay the monthly salary for their employees\' efforts and according to the principles their workers have to give their abilities for the companies they work for.
This is a reasonable exchange between businesses and employees.
>> CORRECT!
>> CORRECT!
>> OR: This is a reasonable exchange between businesses and their employees.
Therefore, Businesses have the rights to select the talented person.
>> Therefore, companies have the right to select talented people.
>> Therefore, companies have the right to select talented people.
>> OR: Therefore, companies have the right to select talented workers.
All of the employees have to try not to fall behind in the competition, and Businesses should encourage them to upgrade their skills and support them.
>> All of the employees have to try not to fall behind in the competition, and businesses should encourage them to upgrade their skills and support them.
>> All of the employees have to try not to fall behind in the competition, and businesses should encourage them to upgrade their skills and support them.
If it is done smoothly, I think we don’t have to consider if Businesses should hire employees for their entire lives or not.
>> If it is done smoothly, I think we don\'t have to consider if businesses should hire employees for their entire lives or not.
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