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2016-10-15 · 첨삭 강사 Rose

학생이 쓴 원문

Basically, it's not right to exclude from certain professions because of their gender. It's true that some jobs don't seem to go well with their genders. However, we can complement the limitations with some measures. A long time ago, all nurses were surely females, but nowadays male nurses are common. When nurses have to take care of heavy patients, it is certainly better for male nurses to do it than females. About 20 years ago, there was no male caddie in the golf courses here. These days, male caddies have been growing. Female golfers tend to prefer young charming male caddies to females. Teachers of elementary schools include around 80 % of females. Once the night duty for female teachers have emerged as a social issue. I don't know how it was addressed, but I guess that the government could take measures such as additional employments of school guards, CCTV installations, and so on. In the Army, all branches are opened for female volunteers. Meanwhile, I have no idea about nuns.

강사 첨삭

Thank you for doing your homework, Mr. [이름]!

I think that nowadays, people are fighting for gender equality~

Have a great weekend, Sir!

See you on Monday!

Basically, it\'s not right to exclude from certain professions because of their gender.

>>Basically, it\'s not right to exclude people from certain professions because of their gender.

 It\'s true that some jobs don\'t seem to go well with their genders.

>>CORRECT!

 However, we can complement the limitations with some measures.

>>CORRECT!
 A long time ago, all nurses were surely females, but nowadays male nurses are common.

>>CORRECT!

When nurses have to take care of heavy patients, it is certainly better for male nurses to do it than females.

>>CORRECT!

About 20 years ago, there was no male caddie in the golf courses here.

>>CORRECT!

 These days, male caddies have been growing.

>>These days, the number of male caddies has been growing.

Female golfers tend to prefer young charming male caddies to females.

>>CORRECT!

 Teachers of elementary schools include around 80 % of females.

>>Teachers of elementary schools consists of around 80 % of females.

Once the night duty for female teachers have emerged as a social issue.

>>Once the night duty for female teachers has emerged as a social issue.

 I don\'t know how it was addressed, but I guess that the government could take measures such as additional employments of school guards, CCTV installations, and so on.

>>CORRECT!

 In the Army, all branches are opened for female volunteers.

>> In the Army, all branches have been opened for female volunteers.

OR>> In the Army, all branches are open for female volunteers.

Meanwhile, I have no idea about nuns.

>>CORRECT!

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