Homework #7
학생이 쓴 원문
Dear [Name],
I can see the rain is falling through the window,
the weather is colder than yesterday, but I can enjoy the atmosphere.
It makes me calm and racall some memories with a cup of coffee.
Q. Describe the best party or large-scale event you’ve ever attended.
A.
It is difficult for me to answer, because I had been quiet in my childhood.
Fortunately I can think that I joined the club related to my major in university.
I could study about my major, and also I made many friends.
The club holds a workshop every year to celebrate new year and have the presentation for members.
After finishing the event, we have the party for us to welcome.
I could see our graduating senior at the party, too.
So we said hello to each other and talked to school lives.
Sometimes I miss that time, because I had my happiest times with them at that time.
강사 첨삭
Dear [Name],
~~Your memory in that club will never last, it\'s something that you can recall whenever you wanted to.
~~Make more memories of your own. Now that you\'re working, you should think of enjoying your life more than creating a career.
Dear [Name],
I can see the rain is falling through the window,
>> I can see the rain dropping on the window.
the weather is colder than yesterday, but I can enjoy the atmosphere.
>> the weather is colder than yesterday, but I am enjoying the atmosphere.
It makes me calm and racall some memories with a cup of coffee.
>> It makes me feel calm and recall some memories with a cup of coffee.
Q. Describe the best party or large-scale event you’ve ever attended.
A.
It is difficult for me to answer, because I had been quiet in my childhood.
>> It is difficult for me to answer because I had been during my childhood.
Fortunately I can think that I joined the club related to my major in university.
>> Fortunately, I can recall the club that I have joined that is related to my major in the university.
I could study about my major, and also I made many friends.
>> CORRECT
The club holds a workshop every year to celebrate new year and have the presentation for members.
>> The club holds a workshop every year to celebrate new year and they hold a presentation for members.
After finishing the event, we have the party for us to welcome.
>> CORRECT
I could see our graduating senior at the party, too.
>> CORRECT
So we said hello to each other and talked to school lives.
>> So we said hello to each other and talked about school life.
Sometimes I miss that time, because I had my happiest times with them at that time.
>> CORRECT
~~Your memory in that club will never last, it\'s something that you can recall whenever you wanted to.
~~Make more memories of your own. Now that you\'re working, you should think of enjoying your life more than creating a career.
Dear [Name],
I can see the rain is falling through the window,
>> I can see the rain dropping on the window.
the weather is colder than yesterday, but I can enjoy the atmosphere.
>> the weather is colder than yesterday, but I am enjoying the atmosphere.
It makes me calm and racall some memories with a cup of coffee.
>> It makes me feel calm and recall some memories with a cup of coffee.
Q. Describe the best party or large-scale event you’ve ever attended.
A.
It is difficult for me to answer, because I had been quiet in my childhood.
>> It is difficult for me to answer because I had been during my childhood.
Fortunately I can think that I joined the club related to my major in university.
>> Fortunately, I can recall the club that I have joined that is related to my major in the university.
I could study about my major, and also I made many friends.
>> CORRECT
The club holds a workshop every year to celebrate new year and have the presentation for members.
>> The club holds a workshop every year to celebrate new year and they hold a presentation for members.
After finishing the event, we have the party for us to welcome.
>> CORRECT
I could see our graduating senior at the party, too.
>> CORRECT
So we said hello to each other and talked to school lives.
>> So we said hello to each other and talked about school life.
Sometimes I miss that time, because I had my happiest times with them at that time.
>> CORRECT
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