homework

2017-03-20 · 첨삭 강사 Shanee

학생이 쓴 원문

I think one negative effect of technology is that when we rely too heavily on them, we get in trouble when there's a problem with them. And as technology advances, we rely heavier on them then before. For example, people didn't need cell phones or computers in 1950's and they lived just fine without it, but today, we can't think of a life without them, and when they don't work we are cut apart from this world. Technology might make our life easier, but it is important that we don't rely too heavily on them.

강사 첨삭

It\'s lunch time [이름]!

I hope they served you hot and delicious lunch there. ^^

I checked your composition and made the necessary corrections.

Kindly check them.

I\'ll see you tomorrow.

~Teacher Shanee^^,

I think one negative effect of technology is that when we rely too heavily on them, we get in trouble when there\'s a problem with them.

>>> OR: I think one negative effect of technology is that when we rely heavily on it to the point that we get ourselves get in trouble when we encounter problems involving technology.

And as technology advances, we rely heavier on them then before.

>>> Correct ! [than]

For example, people didn\'t need cell phones or computers in 1950\'s and they lived just fine without it, but today, we can\'t think of a life without them, and when they don\'t work we are cut apart from this world.

>>> For example, people didn\'t need cell phones or computers in 1950\'s and they lived just fine without them. But today, we can\'t think of a life without them. Also, when they don\'t work we are cut apart from this world.

Technology might make our life easier, but it is important that we don\'t rely too heavily on them.

>>> Correct!

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