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2017-03-28 · 첨삭 강사 Rose

학생이 쓴 원문

My nuclear family is very simple, and it consists of the least members including a father, a mother and a son. When I was in the army, my family used to move here and there so often according to my new assignments almost every year. Especially, when I was assigned as a commander of some units, my family used to be supporters for me, praying for my unit, taking care of my subordinates, and so on. In the past, my family had to live the life of public figures, as if they served the country. Now that I retired from the army, my family means a lot to me as companions to try to make our life more prosperous and meaningful. Two years ago, my family became four including my lovely dog, Rookie. My son bought a white Labrador for us instead of our grandson whom we had longed for. In the near future, our family will increase because my son has recently been dating with a woman. I want my family to share anything with other people in the future, who don't have it. I hope my family will be vitally important to me as comrades to share our possessions with others.

강사 첨삭

I am sure your family supports you no matter what happens, Sir!

Furthermore, I am so glad you treat Rookie like your family member^^

See you tomorrow, Sir!

My nuclear family is very simple, and it consists of the least members including a father, a mother and a son.

>>CORRECT!
When I was in the army, my family used to move here and there so often according to my new assignments almost every year.

>>CORRECT!
Especially, when I was assigned as a commander of some units, my family used to be supporters for me, praying for my unit, taking care of my

ubordinates, and so on.

>>CORRECT!
In the past, my family had to live the life of public figures, as if they served the country.

>>CORRECT!
Now that I retired from the army, my family means a lot to me as companions to try to make our life more prosperous and meaningful.

>>CORRECT!
Two years ago, my family became four including my lovely dog, Rookie.

>>CORRECT!
My son bought a white Labrador for us instead of our grandson whom we had longed for.

>>CORRECT!
In the near future, our family will increase because my son has recently been dating with a woman.

>>CORRECT!
I want my family to share anything with other people in the future, who don\'t have it.

>>CORRECT!
I hope my family will be vitally important to me as comrades to share our possessions with others.

>>CORRECT!

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