homework

2017-06-05 · 첨삭 강사 Glenda

학생이 쓴 원문

Hello,Glenda :) How was your weekend so far? I had enough relax and studied a bit for the exam.I don't have to go company tommorow and the day after tommorow,too. I'm so excited. Anyway Glenda,thank you for your comments,I will try to speak consistantely,it might be need much practice,right? What is your definition of freedom? In my opinion,freedom means independence.If we pursue freedom,we have to choose something without help from others.Only we have to choose with our own, it means we have to have responsibility what I seek for.That's what I can call freedom. Whatever I choose,I feel proud of myself, because I decide something and feel satisfaction through process for freedom.

강사 첨삭

 Hi [이름]! ^^

Happy Monday ^^


Thank you for sharing your ideas and opinion on this topic. :)

Freedom, as they say is one of the greatest gift to people. But it also has

a great responsibility paired with it. We live under a government that speaks about freedom

and independence. May we use it in a good cause. :)

Let\'s review on the corrections and again practice it. :)

 

See yah!


Teacher Glenda 


Here are my corrections:

Hello,Glenda :) How was your weekend so far?
I had enough relax and studied a bit for the exam.

>> I had enough relaxation and studied a bit for the exam.

I don\'t have to go company tommorow and the day after tommorow,too. I\'m so excited. 

>> I don\'t have to go to my company tommorow and the day after tomorrow too. I\'m so excited. 
 Anyway Glenda,thank you for your comments,I will try to speak consistantely,it might be need much practice,right?

>>  Anyway Glenda, thank you for your comments, I will try to speak consistently. It might need more practice, right? 

What is your definition of freedom?
In my opinion,freedom means independence.

>> Correct

If we pursue freedom,we have to choose something without help from others.

>> Correct

Only we have to choose with our own, it means we have to have responsibility what I seek for.

>> Only we have to choose on our own, it means we have to have the sense of  responsibility for what we seek for.

That\'s what I can call freedom.

>> Correct

Whatever I choose,I feel proud of myself, because I decide something and feel satisfaction through process for freedom.

>> Whatever I choose, I feel proud of myself, because I decided for something and I feel satisfied through the process.


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