homework

2017-08-30 · 첨삭 강사 Charlie

학생이 쓴 원문

Some people think that human needs for farmland, housing, and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals. I think human needs for farmland and housing is more important than saving land for animals. If human doesn't live safely and comfortably, we will not care about animals. How can we look after animals unless we feel satisfied?

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]!

Thank you for answering the essay topic given yesterday. ^^ You write good sentences but the flow of essay\'s readability needs a little improvement. Spoken and written English are a bit different in some ways.

Great job all in all!

All good things,

==Teacher Charlie==

Some people think that human needs for farmland, housing, and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals.

I think human needs for farmland and housing is more important than saving land for animals. If human doesn\'t live safely and comfortably, we will not care about animals. How can we look after animals unless we feel satisfied?

>> I agree with the thought that human needs for farmland, housing, and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals because if human needs are not met, wherein they aren\'t living safely and comfortably, humans would not stop to think about the welfare of animals.

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