Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
I think zoos are inhumane and it's eventually not good for animals. The origin of zoos was based on human's greed. Capturing something and shutting them up in limited places are not natural. Some people might say that animals can be provided better environment to live. For example, animals in zoo don't have to struggle to find foods and they don't have to worry about predators. However I personally think living and dying in their own habitats are better for animals. Because freedom is the one of the most precious trait to living things. I will choose to live freely even if I have to struggle to earn daily breads rather than to live in a limited places providing free meals. Furthermore, some zoos are not even providing the perfect places for animals and animals sometimes get sick or die. Of course I think shelters for endangered animals are necessary but typical zoos are mainly for fulfilling humans' interest.
강사 첨삭
Hello there [이름]! :)
Thank you for this wonderful essay.
You\'re correct when you said keeping animals in captivity is not natural.
Nature does not work that way.
If we keep them in a \"safe\" environment, they won\'t learn how to hunt and defend themselves.
Anyhow, I hope you\'re doing great.
See you again tomorrow.
Take care always.
~Teacher Charry
I think zoos are inhumane and it\'s eventually not good for animals.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> I think zoos are inhumane and they\'re not good for animals.
The origin of zoos was based on human\'s greed.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Zoos started because of human\'s greed.
Capturing something and shutting them up in limited places are not natural.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Keeping animals in captivity in a congested place is not natural at all.
Some people might say that animals can be provided better environment to live.
>> Some people might say that animals can be provided with a better environment to live in.
For example, animals in zoo don\'t have to struggle to find foods and they don\'t have to worry about predators.
>> For example, animals in zoo don\'t have to struggle to find food and they don\'t have to worry about predators.
However I personally think living and dying in their own habitats are better for animals.
>> However, I personally think living and dying in their own habitats are better for animals.
Because freedom is the one of the most precious trait to living things.
>> This is because freedom is the one of the most precious trait to living things.
I will choose to live freely even if I have to struggle to earn daily breads rather than to live in a limited places providing free meals.
>> I will choose to live freely even if I have to struggle to earn daily bread rather than to live in a limited place with free meals.
Furthermore, some zoos are not even providing the perfect places for animals and animals sometimes get sick or die.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> In addition, some zoos are not even providing the perfect places for animals and animals sometimes get sick or die.
Of course I think shelters for endangered animals are necessary but typical zoos are mainly for fulfilling humans\' interest.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> I think shelters for endangered animals are necessary but typical zoos are mainly for fulfilling humans\' interest.
Thank you for this wonderful essay.
You\'re correct when you said keeping animals in captivity is not natural.
Nature does not work that way.
If we keep them in a \"safe\" environment, they won\'t learn how to hunt and defend themselves.
Anyhow, I hope you\'re doing great.
See you again tomorrow.
Take care always.
~Teacher Charry
I think zoos are inhumane and it\'s eventually not good for animals.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> I think zoos are inhumane and they\'re not good for animals.
The origin of zoos was based on human\'s greed.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Zoos started because of human\'s greed.
Capturing something and shutting them up in limited places are not natural.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Keeping animals in captivity in a congested place is not natural at all.
Some people might say that animals can be provided better environment to live.
>> Some people might say that animals can be provided with a better environment to live in.
For example, animals in zoo don\'t have to struggle to find foods and they don\'t have to worry about predators.
>> For example, animals in zoo don\'t have to struggle to find food and they don\'t have to worry about predators.
However I personally think living and dying in their own habitats are better for animals.
>> However, I personally think living and dying in their own habitats are better for animals.
Because freedom is the one of the most precious trait to living things.
>> This is because freedom is the one of the most precious trait to living things.
I will choose to live freely even if I have to struggle to earn daily breads rather than to live in a limited places providing free meals.
>> I will choose to live freely even if I have to struggle to earn daily bread rather than to live in a limited place with free meals.
Furthermore, some zoos are not even providing the perfect places for animals and animals sometimes get sick or die.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> In addition, some zoos are not even providing the perfect places for animals and animals sometimes get sick or die.
Of course I think shelters for endangered animals are necessary but typical zoos are mainly for fulfilling humans\' interest.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> I think shelters for endangered animals are necessary but typical zoos are mainly for fulfilling humans\' interest.
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