HOMEWORK

2017-09-28 · 첨삭 강사 Sophia

학생이 쓴 원문

There was no car owner in my hometown composed of about 200 households when I was a child. However, with [이름]dai manufacturing cars on its own, with Koreans' income highly increased, and with customers buying cars on hire purchase, almost all households' dream to possess their own cars began to come true. I have hardly seen such a great network of roads in any developed countries compared to Korea. Although our sagacious government has strived to build a lot of expressways, widen local roads and beef up several kinds of other means of transportation, those measures and actions have never exceeded the speed of exponential increase of cars on the roads. Therefore, the high volume of traffic is a big problem in big cities across the country. It is inevitable for the government to solve this problem. To begin with, the government needs to take measures to calm down the explosive increase of demand for owning cars by strick policies. On top of that, we need to control privately-owned cars coming into big cities. What's more, we should build as many roads bypassing big cities as possible in order to mitigate the heavy traffic.

강사 첨삭

HELLO MR. [이름],
Thank you for telling me about owning a car in Korea.
I do agree with you that we need to control privately-owned cars coming into big cities to lessen the heavy traffic jam.
Have a nice day ahead!
Teacher Sophia
Here are your corrections:
There was no car owner in my hometown composed of about 200 households when I was a child.
>> CORRECT 
However, with [이름]dai manufacturing cars on its own, with Koreans\' income highly increased, and with customers buying cars on hire purchase, almost all households\' dream to possess their own cars began to come true.
>> CORRECT 
I have hardly seen such a great network of roads in any developed countries compared to Korea.
>> CORRECT 
Although our sagacious government has strived to build a lot of expressways, widen local roads and beef up several kinds of other means of transportation, those measures and actions have never exceeded the speed of exponential increase of cars on the roads.
>> CORRECT 
Therefore, the high volume of traffic is a big problem in big cities across the country.
>> CORRECT 
It is inevitable for the government to solve this problem.
>> CORRECT 
To begin with, the government needs to take measures to calm down the explosive increase of demand for owning cars by strick policies.
On top of that, we need to control privately-owned cars coming into big cities.
>> CORRECT  (STRICT instead of STRICK)
What\'s more, we should build as many roads bypassing big cities as possible in order to mitigate the heavy traffic.
>> CORRECT 

파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.

다른 영어첨삭교정 보기

영어첨삭교정 ·