Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
Modern advancements definitely make people's lives more convenient than before. We can travel to abroad by airplane or use the Internet to communicate with people who live in the opposite side of the earth. If convenience means quality of people's lives, then we can say modern advancements enhance the quality of people's lives. However I don't think convenience directly means the quality of life. We can often hear that old but good values disappear due to modern technologies. For example, I read that people don't interact with neighbors like we did in the past due to refrigerators. The article said that people shared home made foods with neighbors because the food could be spoiled easily and people chose to share it with other people. We don't have to do that anymore since we can keep the food longer than before by using refrigerator. Modern advancements give us something but also takes away some values. Therefore I don't think modern advancements always enhance the quality of life.
강사 첨삭
Hello there [이름]! :)
I heard it\'s freezing cold out there.
Are you okay?
Anyhow, thank you for taking the time to write an essay.
I loved this one. ^^
I honestly think that technological advancements are good but once they are abused, they become bad for us.
A concrete example for this would be computers and smart phones.
If we don\'t use them properly, they can have a bad effect on us.
Anyway, I hope you\'re doing great. :)
See you again tomorrow.
That\'s it for today.
Take care always.
~Teacher Charry
>> Modern advancements definitely made people\'s lives more convenient than before.
We can travel to abroad by airplane or use the Internet to communicate with people who live in the opposite side of the earth.
>> We can travel abroad by airplane or use the Internet to communicate with people who live in the opposite side of the earth.
If convenience means quality of people\'s lives, then we can say modern advancements enhance the quality of people\'s lives.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> If convenience means quality of people\'s lives, then we can say that modern advancements enhance the quality of people\'s lives.
However I don\'t think convenience directly means the quality of life.
>> However, I don\'t think convenience directly equates to the quality of life.
We can often hear that old but good values disappear due to modern technologies.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> We often hear that old but good values disappear due to modern technologies.
For example, I read that people don\'t interact with neighbors like we did in the past due to refrigerators.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> For instance, I read that people don\'t interact with neighbors like we did in the past due to refrigerators.
The article said that people shared home made foods with neighbors because the food could be spoiled easily and people chose to share it with other people.
>> The article said that people shared home made food with neighbors because the food could be spoiled easily and people chose to share it with other people.
We don\'t have to do that anymore since we can keep the food longer than before by using refrigerator.
>> We don\'t have to do that anymore since we can keep the food longer than before by using refrigerators.
OR >> We don\'t have to do that anymore since we can keep the food longer than before by using a refrigerator.
Modern advancements give us something but also takes away some values.
>> Modern advancements give us something but also take away some values.
Therefore I don\'t think modern advancements always enhance the quality of life.
>> Therefore, I don\'t think modern advancements always enhance the quality of life.
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