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2017-12-14 · 첨삭 강사 Sophia

학생이 쓴 원문

My wife is used to doing on-line shopping. She has already purchased lots of items on-line, such as an electric hair clipper for Rookie, an electric heater for me, some clothes for her and so on. However, I prefer to buy something at markets at first hand rather than on-line. I think there are the advantages and disadvantages of on-line shopping for both individuals and companies. First of all, one of the advantages of on-line shopping would be that we can save time to buy something so we can enjoy its convenience. We are also able to achieve cost-effectiveness through comparing one with others using the Internet and get the best goods. Meanwhile, one of the disadvantages of on-line shopping would be that we could be duped by swindlers so we couldn't get anything or we could get something bad. Moreover, we could bother with repacking, sending and retaking it in case when we receive something different from what I want or something damaged. I want to keep my way of life which I buy something on the spot trying them on and confirming their collar and quality.

강사 첨삭

HELLO MR [이름],
Have a nice day ahead.
Teacher Sophia
Here are your corrections:
My wife is used to doing on-line shopping.
>> CORRECT 
She has already purchased lots of items on-line, such as an electric hair 
clipper for Rookie, an electric heater for me, some clothes for her and so on.
>>  CORRECT 
However, I prefer to buy something at markets at first hand rather than on-line.
>>  CORRECT 
I think there are the advantages and disadvantages of on-line shopping for both individuals and companies.
>>  CORRECT 
First of all, one of the advantages of on-line shopping would be that we can save time to buy something so we can enjoy its convenience.
>>  CORRECT 
We are also able to achieve cost-effectiveness through comparing one with others using the Internet and get the best goods. 
>>  CORRECT 
Meanwhile, one of the disadvantages of on-line shopping would be that we could be duped by swindlers so we couldn\'t get anything or we could get something bad.
>>  CORRECT 
Moreover, we could bother with repacking, sending and retaking it in case when we receive something different from what I want or something damaged.
>>  CORRECT 
I want to keep my way of life which I buy something on the spot trying them on and confirming their collar and quality.
>>  CORRECT 

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