Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
Internet and computers are used in literally everywhere. There was no Internet when I was 8 or 9 years old and I lived well but I can't think my life without Internet now. I register class or submit important documents through online and I search which restaurant is good for having a lunch with friends on my phone. Even if I don't want to use the Internet and email, all systems in this society already are based on the Internet. I often feel that I'm stuck in this soon to be big brother like Internet society but choosing whether use the Internet or not is not up to me anymore. Searching what I need immediately whenever and wherever I want on my phone is really convenient. However I also think I rely on the Internet too much because I almost immediately search what I want to know rather than think myself. I think current Internet and computers based societies also have some problems like hacking but as I mentioned above, I can't be out of this system alone so I will just live like this.
강사 첨삭
Hi, [이름]! ^_^
At last, this day is about to end at work.
I\'m truly happy about it. kkk.
How are you doing so far?
I hope your\'e doing great.
Thanks for writing this essay. I honestly think it\'s good.
It\'s true that people rely too much on the Internet and computers.
I think that\'s the main reason why the attention span of people nowadays is getting shorter and shorter.
Anyhow, I agree that it\'s very convenient and I think the machines are indeed taking over! kkk.
See you again tomorrow dear!
Take care always! ^_^
~Teacher Charry
Internet and computers are used in literally everywhere. >> Internet and computers are literally used everywhere.
There was no Internet when I was 8 or 9 years old and I lived well but I can\'t think my life without Internet now.
>> There was no Internet when I was 8 or 9 years old and I lived well but I can\'t think of my life now without Internet.
I register class or submit important documents through online and I search which restaurant is good for having a lunch with friends on my phone.
>> I register in a class or submit important documents online and I search which restaurant is good to have a lunch with friends on my phone.
Even if I don\'t want to use the Internet and email, all systems in this society already are based on the Internet.
>> Even if I don\'t want to use the Internet and email, all systems in this society are already based on the Internet.
I often feel that I\'m stuck in this soon to be big brother like Internet society but choosing whether use the Internet or not is not up to me anymore.
>> [Do you mean]: I often feel that I\'m stuck in this Internet society but choosing whether to use the Internet or not is not up to me anymore.
Searching what I need immediately whenever and wherever I want on my phone is really convenient.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Looking for what I need immediately whenever and wherever I want on my phone is really convenient.
However I also think I rely on the Internet too much because I almost immediately search what I want to know rather than think myself.
>> However, I also think I rely on the Internet too much because I almost immediately search for what I want to know rather than think myself.
I think current Internet and computers based societies also have some problems like hacking but as I mentioned above, I can\'t be out of this system alone so I will just live like this.
>> I think the current Internet and computer-based societies also have some problems like hacking but as I mentioned above, I can\'t be out of this system alone so I will just live like this.
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