homework

Hello Jake.

Thank you for your composition.

Please take note of the corrections and suggestions.

Keep up the good work.

~~ Teacher Sharon

First of all, especially in weekdays, I should visit my company\'s site which offers several services that I need to work.

>> First of all, especially on weekdays, I should visit my company\'s site which offers several services that I need to work on.

I can check my e-mail of my company account, can use a company messanger, can also write approval documents in the site.

>> I can check my e-mail on the company account, use the company messenger service, and also write approval documents on the site. 
Second, I use search engines such as www.naver.com and www.google.com.

>> Correct

I think most Koreans use Naver because its user interface is suitable for Koreans.

>> Correct 

The site provides some kinds of information that we need to know as well as search engines.

>> The site provides different kinds of information that we need to know as well as search engines.

Many Koreans visit the site almost every day.

>> Correct

But if you need more expertise, visit Google.

>> Correct

Google\'s search engine shows the best performance in the world.

>> Correct
Lastly, I visit some on-line shopping mall when I need to buy something.

>> Lastly, I visit some online shopping sites when I need to buy something.

In Korea, there are lots of delivery company that delivers very fast.

>> In Korea, there are lots of delivery companies that deliver very fast.

Sometimes, I can get the products in same day that I order it.

>> Sometimes, I can get the products on the same day that I order it.

So nowadays many Korean profer to use on-line markets than off-line markets.

>> So nowadays many Koreans prefer to use online markets than offline markets.