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2018-10-15 · 첨삭 강사 Beth

학생이 쓴 원문

> What makes convenience stores in Korea unique or different? In Korea, there are many convenience stores in small area, so that a lot of competitions between them are existence. Due to these reasons, convenience stores in Korea have various foods such as triangle gimbap or banana milk. Especially, I think lunch box make Korea's convenience unique. According for single household to increase abruptly, lunch box's demand has been increasing with this trends. These lunch box's price are built from $3.5 to $5 and have cost-effectiveness. So, students who don't have enough money usually buy lunch box after finishing private academy class. This culture also make Korea's convenience stores unique because a person who finishing school or academy class come in these stores for eating lunch box alone. So, when going to Korea's convenience store, you can see people who eat lunch box alone.

강사 첨삭

Hello Jin young. Thank you for this. I wonder, do they sell side dishes in Korean convenience stores as well?

- T. Beth

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In Korea, there are many convenience stores in small area, so that a lot of competitions between them are existence.

>>>>  In Korea, there are many convenience stores in small areas, which creates big competition between them.   

Due to these reasons, convenience stores in Korea have various foods such as triangle gimbap or banana milk.

>>>>  CORRECT.

>>>> Because of this, convenience stores in Korea have various food such as triangle gimbap or banana milk.   

Especially, I think lunch box make Korea\'s convenience unique.

>>>>  OR: On top of that, I think lunch boxes make Korea\'s convenience stores unique.   

According for single household to increase abruptly, lunch box\'s demand has been increasing with this trends.

>>>>   Due to the increase of single households,  demand for lunch boxes has been increasing.

>>>> OR: The demand on lunch boxes has increased accordingly due to the abrupt increase of single households. 

These lunch box\'s price are built from $3.5 to $5 and have cost-effectiveness.

>>>> These lunch box\'s price range from $3.5 to $5 and are cost-effective.    

So, students who don\'t have enough money usually buy lunch box after finishing private academy class.

>>>> CORRECT.   

This culture also make Korea\'s convenience stores unique because a person who finishing school or academy class come in these stores for eating lunch box alone.

>>>> This culture also makes Korean convenience stores unique because a person who just finished school or academy class come in these stores to eat a lunch box alone.    

So, when going to Korea\'s convenience store, you can see people who eat lunch box alone.

>>>>   CORRECT.

>>>>  OR: Therefore, when going to Korea\'s convenience store, you can commonly see people eating lunch boxes alone.


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