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2019-01-17 · 첨삭 강사 Beth

학생이 쓴 원문

I want to travel in Europe again. Two years ago, I traveled some country in Europe with my some friends. We visited art biennale held in Germany and Venice, and went to many art galleries and museums. That was really exciting. But there was one thing that was lacking. We couldn’t see a lot of tourist attractions because we had to see a exhibition. So if I have a chance to travel in Europe, I want to go a tourist attractions and a place to rest such as beach, park and mountain.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]! Thank you for the effort of sending this in. This sounds great. Europe is really a great place. There are many places to visit there as well. I hope to go there someday too.

- T. Beth

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I want to travel in Europe again.

>>> CORRECT.

>>> OR: I want to travel to Europe again.    

Two years ago, I traveled some country in Europe with my some friends.

>>>  Two years ago, I traveled to some countries in Europe with some of my friends.  

We visited art biennale held in Germany and Venice, and went to many art galleries and museums.

>>> CORRECT.  

That was really exciting. But there was one thing that was lacking.

>>> CORRECT.  

We couldn’t see a lot of tourist attractions because we had to see a exhibition.

>>> We couldn’t see a lot of tourist attractions because we had to see an exhibition.   

So if I have a chance to travel in Europe, I want to go a tourist attractions and a place to rest such as beach, park and mountain.

>>>So if I have a chance to travel to Europe, I want to go to tourist attractions and a place to rest such as beach, park and mountain.   

 

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