homework

2019-09-16 · 첨삭 강사 Vance

학생이 쓴 원문

HOMEWORK: What are some good and bad points about social networking? First, good thing is can communicate and connect every country people. people can see their lives and culture. If i post the letter, people can see this and spread to unknown people. In other word, we can make other country people. However, also have a bad things, For example, you can hacked by someone your account. I suffered this happen before, So someone used my account for their profit. Also, It can be addiction to children very easily. Almost Korea children had been used their cellphone and spent lot of time. I think that people should be less to using cellphone but also find what they want.

강사 첨삭

First, good thing is can communicate and connect every country people.
>>First, the good thing is we can communicate and connect to every people in a country.

people can see their lives and culture. If i post the letter, people can see this and spread to unknown people.
>>People can see their lives and culture. If I post a letter, people can see this and spread it to unknown people.

In other word, we can make other country people.
>>In other word, we can make meet other people in different countries.

However, also have a bad things, For example, you can hacked by someone your account.
>>However, there are also some bad points, for example, you can get hacked by someone.

I suffered this happen before, So someone used my account for their profit.
>>I suffered from this situation before, so someone used my account for their profit.

Also, It can be addiction to children very easily.
>>Also, it can cause addiction to some children.

Almost Korea children had been used their cellphone and spent lot of time.
>>Almost all Korean children had been using their cellphone and spent lot of time with those devices. 

I think that people should be less to using cellphone but also find what they want.
>>I think that people should avoid using cellphone too much but also find what they want.

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