Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
Some people think that companies should provide employees with exercise time during the day. What is your opinion about this?
I also agree this opinion. This is because doing exercise during weekdays helps people rise work efficiency. Moreover, It also make people stay fit. For example, there are many compaines which have gym in the building for their employees. So, providing exercise opportunities to employees is beneficial not only employees but also companies.
강사 첨삭
Hi [이름]!
It\'s been a while since I have read your work.
I\'m glad you\'re writing again.
Have fun with the topics and develop your knowledge and skills.^^
~~Teacher Sharon
I also agree this opinion.
>> I also agree with this opinion.
This is because doing exercise during weekdays helps people rise work efficiency.
>> This is because doing exercise during weekdays helps people to improve work efficiency.
Moreover, It also make people stay fit.
>> Moreover, it also makes people stay fit.
For example, there are many compaines which have gym in the building for their employees.
>> For example, there are many companies which have a gym in the building for their employees.
So, providing exercise opportunities to employees is beneficial not only employees but also companies.
>> So, providing exercise opportunities for employees is beneficial not only to employees but also to companies.
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