HOMEWORK2

2020-12-16 · 첨삭 강사 Mayleen

학생이 쓴 원문

[HOMEWORK] What would the world be like if eveyone had access to a good education? Anwser in not more than 5 sentences. If everyone had access to a good education, the world would be more safe. There are a lot of criminal who haven\'t been educated well. I think some crime can be prevent by eduvation of law, ethics, sex, and so on. Also, Fraud crime could be decreasd by educating illiterates.

강사 첨삭

Hello there, [이름]!
(^__^)

Thank you so much for accomplishing your homework.
You did a very good job in expressing your thoughts. However, I have made some modifications.
We can talk about this in class if you want to.
See you!

__T. Mayleen :)


If everyone had access to a good education, the world would be more safe.
>>> If everyone had access to good education, the world would be safer.
There are a lot of criminal who haven\'t been educated well.
>>> There are a lot of criminals who hadn\'t been educated well.
I think some crime can be prevent by eduvation of law, ethics, sex, and so on.
>>> I think some crimes can be prevented by teaching the people about the law, ethics, sex education and so on.
Also, Fraud crime could be decreasd by educating illiterates.
>>> Also, fraud crimes could be decreased by educating those who are illiterate.

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