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Crime is very serious problem in society and so, many pioneers, policy makers and the others try to figure out the problem nowadays. 

>> Crime is a very serious problem in society and so, many pioneers, policy makers and others try to figure out this problem nowadays. 

Some people argue that longer imprisonment is the best idea or there are other ways to prevent crime. 

>> Some people argue that longer imprisonment is the best idea or there are other ways to prevent crimes. 

This essay will discuss the both opinions and would express my opinion as well. 

>> This essay will discuss both opinions and I would express my opinion as well. 

Supporters the idea of longer imprisonment believe that most criminals cannot be changed to ordinary people. 

>> Supporters of the idea of longer imprisonment believe that most criminals can’t change to live like ordinary people. 

Moreover, they will commit the same sins or more serious crimes. 

>> Correct

Thus, they do not want them to come out from prison or live in longer. 

>> Thus, these supporters want criminals to stay in prison for a longer period of time.

They also think prison sentence is too short to criminals. 

>> They also think that prison sentences are too short for criminals. 

For instance, the prison sentence of rape child (sexual violence) is just 10 years in Korea meaning that if a six years old child rape by a criminal, he/she will release when the child will be sixteen years old. 

>> For instance, the prison sentence for someone who rapes a child (sexual violence) is just 10 years in Korea which means that if a six-year-old child is raped by a criminal, the latter will be released when the child would be sixteen years old. 

The child still so young and it makes the child feel scary. 

>> The child would still be young and, therefore, would be scared.

The other people believe that imprisonment is not good punishment. 

>> Other people believe that imprisonment is not a good punishment. 

Criminals are just separated by society and spend their time in prison. 

>> Criminals are just isolated from society while they spend their time in prison. 

For changing their bed behavior, we need to make them to live with us and give them challenges such as volunteering, con[이름]tation, education and so on. 

>> To reform bad behavior, we need to make them live with us and give them challenges such as volunteering, con[이름]tation, education and so on. 

In conclusion, I think that criminals’ bed behavior are not changed easily and so, they need time to be changed longer in prison with suitable con[이름]tant and education. 

>> In conclusion, I think that criminals’ bad behavior is not changed easily and so, they need a longer time to change in prison with suitable con[이름]tation and education. 

Moreover, the criminals who do not change even had proper solution, they should not be released by prison for preventing people.

>> Moreover, criminals who do not change even with proper solutions should not be released from prison to protect the people.