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2019-09-25 · 첨삭 강사 Lucy

학생이 쓴 원문

Please answer any of the following questions below: 1. What do you think would be the most appropriate age to retire? 2. What do you think of the idea that people should be obliged to retire at earlier ages so that younger people have more job opportunities? The age of retirement has a statutory age. But I think I should quit when I\'m not interested in the job. It is time for young people to have many dreams. Therefore, I think they should challenge themselves when there is something they want to do. However, they have to work hard because they have to take responsibility for the results.

강사 첨삭

Thank you Ms. [Name]!


It\'s a fascinating essay of yours, Ms. [Name]! Please keep it up.

~Teacher Lucy


The age of retirement has a statutory age.

>>CORRECT!

>>The government came to conclusion for the exact retirement age.


 But I think I should quit when I\'m not interested in the job.

>>CORRECT!

>>When I\'m not interested in the job, I should quit.


 It is time for young people to have many dreams.

>>CORRECT!

>>It\'s time for the younger generation to have lots of dreams.


Therefore, I think they should challenge themselves when there is something they want to do.

>>CORRECT!

>>Nonetheless, they should face every challenges bravely.


 However, they have to work hard because they have to take responsibility for the results.

>>CORRECT!

>>Moreover, they have to endure every challenges which will help them to be strong taking responsibilities in the future.


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