How can we minimize bullying?

2021-04-22 · 첨삭 강사 Elise

학생이 쓴 원문

School violence is the most common bullying, so I\'ll talk about it. I think the teacher\'s role is very important. Usually, bullied children are weak or timid and cannot respond. Therefore, teachers should observe students\' school life more intensively and talk to them personally. And bullied friends may be speechless for fear of retaliation. Therefore, students who bully should take out of school or sent to other schools.

강사 첨삭

Hi Steve! Bullying has been a major problem all over the world. Not only for kids but with adults as well. It affects us, not only physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. Some people are actually not taking this seriously. This has to be put on stop now. Your ideas are good! I wish that everyone would have the same thinking like you :)

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I\'m so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

School violence is the most common bullying, so I\'ll talk about it. 
>>School violence is the most common type of bullying, so I\'ll talk about it. 

I think the teacher\'s role is very important. 
>> CORRECT

Usually, bullied children are weak or timid and cannot respond. 
>>CORRECT

Therefore, teachers should observe students\' school life more intensively and talk to them personally.
>> CORRECT

And bullied friends may be speechless for fear of retaliation. 
>> CORRECT

Therefore, students who bully should take out of school or sent to other schools.
>>Therefore, students who bully should be taken out of school or sent to other schools.

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