How do you like your retirement would be like?
학생이 쓴 원문
In this contemporary society, planing our retirement is the important issue, according to expended life span.
When I may retire is around 15 years later from now. I will be almost 60 years old.
In that time, I want to live a leisurely retirement life.
For example, I am going to take a walk two or three times per week for my health and go abroad at least once in a year with my husband if my body condition can cover the trip. Also, I won\'t stop learning such as foreign languages and doing my hobby, which are knitting and making flowers. Learning makes me feel alive. Furthermore, family should be with me.
I am dreaming a wonderful retirement with my family.
I am a kind of independent person, but I don\'t want to be alone when I am old.
Having a beautiful retirement is rearlly difficult.
강사 첨삭
Hi there Young Won!
Indeed retirement is one of the primary considerations when it comes to aging as it is very challenging physically and emotionally. However, it is one of the realities that we have to contend with as it will come whether we like it or not.
Thus, we have to embrace it with readiness.
Thanks once again for being able to craft a very good essay. Excellent job!
-T. Donna =)
>> Correct!
Or: planning (spelling)
When I may retire is around 15 years later from now. I will be almost 60 years old.
>> When I retire around 15 years later from now, I will be almost 60 years old.
In that time, I want to live a leisurely retirement life.
>> Correct!
Or: >> During that time...
For example, I am going to take a walk two or three times per week for my health and go abroad at least once in a year with my husband if my body condition can cover the trip. Also, I won\'t stop learning such as foreign languages and doing my hobby, which are knitting and making flowers. Learning makes me feel alive.
>> Correct! Very good sentences!
Furthermore, family should be with me.
>> Furthermore, my family should be with me.
I am dreaming a wonderful retirement with my family.
>> Correct!
I am a kind of independent person, but I don\'t want to be alone when I am old.
>> Correct!
Having a beautiful retirement is rearlly difficult.
>> Correct!
Or: really (spelling)
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