How important is your mobile phone in your business and personal life?

2015-04-02 · 첨삭 강사 Kathrine

학생이 쓴 원문

Information Technology is essential for all industries and all life. Especially, a smart phone is indispensable in our daily life. I start at every morning with waking-up call of my smart phone. I go to jogging with my dog with listening music through my phone. I check all the e-mail and social network such as facebook and kakaotalk on the way to my office. If I left my smart phone home, I must come back home to bring the phone because I can't work without my phone. I couldn't remember as much as my phone number. Several decades ago, I worked for making policies to promote the electronic industry in Korea. At that time, we did brainstorming what machine will be the center of a life among TV and computer and phone. We believed that TV might be the center of our life, and then a computer is the center of the life. Since 2000, we believe that the phone might be the center of our daily life. We believe that a phone age will be gone and wearable computer will be the center of our daily life

강사 첨삭

Hi there Mr. [이름]! ^^

Well, you have a futuristic thought and I agree with that.
Nowadays, they are inventing wearable devices  which would make our life convenient and comfortable.
So it is no surprised that maybe in the next 5 years, we would already have to wearable devices you have mentioned.

Anyway, thanks for sharing your thoughts. I will see you again next week so I hope that you will have a great weekend.
See you then! Thanks for today!


Always,
Kathrine ^^


Information Technology is essential for all industries and all life.

>> Information Technology is essential for all industries and in our daily life.

Especially, a smart phone is indispensable in our daily life.

>> correct!

I start at every morning with waking-up call of my smart phone.

>> I start my day every morning with a wake-up call on my smart phone. 

I go to jogging with my dog with listening music through my phone.

>> I go jogging with my dog while listening to music on my phone.

 I check all the e-mail and social network such as facebook and kakaotalk on the way to my office.

>> I check all the e-mails and the social networking sites like Facebook and Kakaotalk while on my way to the office.

If I left my smart phone home, I must come back home to bring the phone because I can\'t work without my phone.

>> If I left my smart phone at home, I must go back to bring my phone because I couldn\'t work without it.

 I couldn\'t remember as much as my phone number.

>> correct!

>> or: I couldn\'t remember any contact numbers except for my phone number.

Several decades ago, I worked for making policies to promote the electronic industry in Korea.

>> Several decades ago, I have been working to make policies to promote the electronic industry in Korea.

At that time, we did brainstorming what machine will be the center of a life among TV and computer and phone.

>> At that time, we had a brainstorming about which machine would be the center of our life. Would it be the TV, computer, or phone?

We believed that TV might be the center of our life, and then a computer is the center of the life.

>> We believed that TV might be the center of our live, and then computer became the center of our life.

Since 2000, we believe that the phone might be the center of our daily life.

>>  correct!

 We believe that a phone age will be gone and wearable computer will be the center of our daily life

>> We believe that the phone age will soon be gone and the wearable computer will become the center of our daily life.

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