HW
학생이 쓴 원문
If I could choose a obsolete game to revive, I would like to resurrect Blade & Soul 2. Although Blade & Soul 2 was released in 2021 and may not be considered completely as a classic game, it\'s based on the IP of Blade & Soul, which was released in 2012. Blade & Soul 2 garnered high expectations upon its release, building on the validated Blade & Soul IP. However, it received criticism for its immoderate pay-to-win monetization model, which detracted from gameplay, and it struggled to showcase the strengths of its predecessor. Nevertheless, I believe that elements like its impactful action, unique Eastern-inspired world, and iconic bosses could shine if the game were improved. Additionally, transitioning a successful PC game like Blade & Soul to a more accessible mobile platform could attract a larger player base. To achieve this revival and improvement, adopting a gradual update approach akin to Lost Ark, enhancing the game\'s monetization structure, and establishing user-friendly opera
강사 첨삭
Hello, Eugene! Your analysis is detailed and thoughtful. It is well-organized as usual and showcases your knowledge of the game\'s strengths and weaknesses. In addition, the solutions and improvements you proposed demonstrate strategic thinking and problem-solving skills. Well done!
~ Teacher Maxine
If I could choose a obsolete game to revive, I would like to resurrect Blade & Soul 2.
>> If I could choose an obsolete game to revive, I would like to resurrect Blade & Soul 2.
Although Blade & Soul 2 was released in 2021 and may not be considered completely as a classic game, it\'s based on the IP of Blade & Soul, which was released in 2012.
>> CORRECT!
Blade & Soul 2 garnered high expectations upon its release, building on the validated Blade & Soul IP.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Blade & Soul 2 generated high expectations upon its launch, leveraging the established Blade & Soul IP.
However, it received criticism for its immoderate pay-to-win monetization model, which detracted from gameplay, and it struggled to showcase the strengths of its predecessor.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> However, it faced criticism for its pay-to-win monetization model, which negatively impacted gameplay, and it struggled to highlight its predecessor\'s strengths.
Nevertheless, I believe that elements like its impactful action, unique Eastern-inspired world, and iconic bosses could shine if the game were improved.
>> CORRECT!
Additionally, transitioning a successful PC game like Blade & Soul to a more accessible mobile platform could attract a larger player base.
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Moreover, transitioning Blade & Soul from PC to mobile could broaden its player base significantly.
To achieve this revival and improvement, adopting a gradual update approach akin to Lost Ark, enhancing the game\'s monetization structure, and establishing user-friendly opera
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Revitalization efforts should include adopting a gradual update approach, refining the monetization model, and ensuring user-friendly operations.
파워잉글리쉬 영어첨삭교정 서비스에 실제로 접수된 글입니다. 작성자와 글에 등장하는 사람·회사 이름, 연락처 등 개인을 알아볼 수 있는 정보는 모두 지웠습니다. 문법 오류는 학습 자료로서의 가치를 위해 원문 그대로 두었습니다.