HW
학생이 쓴 원문
Two factors continually drive me to hustle within the industry: passion for gaming and results. Firstly, being a gamer at heart, I inherently enjoy playing games, which makes working in the gaming industry fulfilling. This passion sustains me through challenging times. For instance, my consistent involvement in content production activities ensures my perseverance. Secondly, the results of my hard work serve as motivation. Successes like securing significant contracts or improving processes in my current role fuel my desire to achieve further. As someone who constantly seeks growth, I channel this passion into areas I care about deeply.
강사 첨삭
Hello, Eugene!
You used effective expressions and organization to showcase your ideas in this response while maintaining a professional tone.
Great job!
~ Teacher Maxine
Two factors continually drive me to hustle within the industry: passion for gaming and results.
>> CORRECT
Firstly, being a gamer at heart, I inherently enjoy playing games, which makes working in the gaming industry fulfilling.
>> CORRECT
This passion sustains me through challenging times.
>> CORRECT
For instance, my consistent involvement in content production activities ensures my perseverance.
>> CORRECT
OR >> For example, my unwavering commitment to content production activities reflects this dedication.
Secondly, the results of my hard work serve as motivation.
>> CORRECT
OR >> Secondly, the tangible outcomes of my hard work serve as a powerful source of motivation.
Successes like securing significant contracts or improving processes in my current role fuel my desire to achieve further.
>> CORRECT
As someone who constantly seeks growth, I channel this passion into areas I care about deeply.
>> CORRECT
OR >> As someone who is constantly seeking personal and professional growth, I channel this passion into meaningful contributions within the areas I deeply care about.
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