I agree that In the future young men in Korea should have the right to choose whether they go to mil
학생이 쓴 원문
ESSAY: Young men especially in Korea must have the right to choose when it comes to military. Do you agree or disagree?
I agree that In the future young men in Korea should have the right to choose whether they go to military service or not. Nowadays Korea is still struggling with divided problem north and south. So for now military service is essential for Korea men. But military service is one of the hardest things for young men so that they have struggling with military service. Some of the young men were dying in military service. And they should spend their time in meaningless(It means that somebody spend their time in military service without improvement of themselves).
So for the future Korea should reduce a military service people and Korea should make a military service as \"Enlistment\". It means that Korea young men have the right to choose military service.
강사 첨삭
Hi there Sir JY~! ^^ It\'s amazing! I\'m still at work though our city is already under community quarantine. kkk
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree that in the future young men in Korea should have the right to choose whether they go to military service or not.
>>> CORRECT
Nowadays Korea is still struggling with divided problem north and south.
>>> Nowadays, Korea is still struggling with the problem between north and south.
So for now military service is essential for Korea men.
>>> CORRECT
But military service is one of the hardest things for young men so that they have struggling with military service.
>>> But military service is one of the hardest things for young men so that they are struggling with military service.
Some of the young men were dying in military service.
>>> Some of young men are dying in the military.
And they should spend their time in meaningless(It means that somebody spend their time in military service without improvement of themselves).
>>> And they should spend their time meaningless (It means that somebody spend their time in the military without improvement of himself).
So for the future Korea should reduce a military service people and Korea should make a military service as \"Enlistment\".
So for the future Korea should reduce a military service people and Korea should make a military service as \"Enlistment\".
>>> So Korea should reduce the military service and make as \"enlistment\" in the future.
It means that Korea young men have the right to choose military service.
>>> It means that young Korean men have the right to choose to go to the military service or not.
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