I don\'t think it is wrong. But...
학생이 쓴 원문
I think it is necessary for people to eat meats to provide protine. I also eat meats. But sometimes I feel sorry to the animals that are raised as meats in narrow pen. Because of it, some people choose to be a vegeterian. There are several merits in being vegeterian that is to protect animal\'s life, the least rights and can be good for human\'s health. Disadvantages of being vegeterian are that may be lack of protein, few choices of selecting foods, unable to have eating pleasure etc. So, even though I love animals, it is so much difficult to decide to be a vegeterian.
강사 첨삭
Hello, Ju [이름]. Thank you for doing your homework in advance.^^ I appreciate your opinions and for sharing them. Let\'s talk tomorrow in class. Have a nice evening. ~Teacher Jance c\",)
I think it is necessary for people to eat meats to provide protine.
>> I think it is necessary for people to eat meat that contains protein.
I also eat meats.
>> I also eat meat.
But sometimes I feel sorry to the animals that are raised as meats in narrow pen.
>> But sometimes I feel sorry for the animals that are raised for their meat in narrow pens.
Because of it, some people choose to be a vegeterian.
>> Because of it, some people choose to be vegetarian.
There are several merits in being vegeterian that is to protect animal\'s life, the least rights and can be good for human\'s health.
>> There are several merits in being vegetarian, that is to protect animals\' life, the least rights and can be good for humans\' health.
Disadvantages of being vegeterian are that may be lack of protein, few choices of selecting foods, unable to have eating pleasure etc.
>> The disadvantages of being vegetarian are that there may be a lack of protein, few choices for selecting foods, unable to have eating pleasure, etc.
So, even though I love animals, it is so much difficult to decide to be a vegeterian.
>> So, even though I love animals, it is so much difficult to decide to be a vegetarian.
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