I would not spend more time with my computer.

2023-11-15 · 첨삭 강사 Sharon

학생이 쓴 원문

I don\'t want to spend more time with my computer. There are two reasons. First, when I looking at the computer\'s screen, it feels dizzy. It\'s because, it is bigger than the smartphone\'s screen. Second, I spend a lot of time with my smartphone. I don\'t want to spend more time to use others anymore. In conclusion, I would not spend more time with my computer.

강사 첨삭

Hi [이름]!
Thank you for your efforts. 
You always surprise me when you come up with a composition.
You\'re just improving over time.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I don\'t want to spend more time with my computer.
>> Correct
There are two reasons.
>> Correct
First, when I looking at the computer\'s screen, it feels dizzy.
>> First, when I look at the computer\'s screen, it makes me feel dizzy.
It\'s because, it is bigger than the smartphone\'s screen.
>> It\'s because it is bigger than a smartphone\'s screen.
Second, I spend a lot of time with my smartphone.
>> Correct
I don\'t want to spend more time to use others anymore.
>> Correct
In conclusion, I would not spend more time with my computer.
>> Correct

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