ielts taks 1

2021-01-15 · 첨삭 강사 Donna

학생이 쓴 원문

Dear [Name], How are you these days,I hope everything is going well. I am writing to tell you about where I went to concert It was really fantastic. not only a singer who sang the music but also his member who played instruments was skilled at their duties. actually I felt a little jealous of them. because we always tried to be good at the our band and to improve our musical skills. Do you remember that ? we practiced drum or guitar during every all night and applying for a audition as well. it was quite hard moment ,but I think it was very wonderful experience. well,so i would like to musical activities again.I will buy a new equipment and recruit new members. In this situation , I need your help so much, I know you have quited the music and you are afraid of starting music again ,but we can do again well ! if you want to again the music. please call me, my phone number has not changed yet, since 20years ago. Take care, I really miss you. Your good frien

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]!

It seems that your entries here are real. Being a musician is really hard as it does not earn a regular income yet it is so much fun.

In your answer, you have to write and describe only one person and not two different people. The tasks is asking for only one person and say how you feel about his/her performance, details of his/her musical activities, and how you would want that person to help you become a better musician.

I will explain what I mean in class later in class.

See you.

-T. Donna =)

Dear [Name],
>> Correct!

How are you these days,I hope everything is going well.
I am writing to tell you about where I went to concert
>> Correct! (Put period at the end of your sentence.)

It was really fantastic. not only a singer who sang the music but also his member who played instruments was skilled at their duties. actually I felt a little jealous of them.
>> It was really fantastic. It\'s not only the singer who sang the music but also his member who played the instruments was skilled at their duties. Actually I felt a little jealous of them.

because we always tried to be good at the our band and to improve our musical skills.
Do you remember that ? we practiced drum or guitar during every all night and applying for a audition as well.
it was quite hard moment ,but I think it was very wonderful experience.
>> We always tried to be good at the our band and to improve our musical skills.
Do you remember that ? We practiced drums or guitars every night to apply for an audition as well.
It was quite a hard moment, but I think it was a very wonderful experience.


well,so i would like to musical activities again.I will buy a new equipment and recruit new members. In this situation , I need your help so much, I know you have quited the music and you are afraid of starting music again ,but we can do again well !
>> So I would like to expereince musical activities again. I will buy a new equipment and recruit new members. In this situation , I need your help so much, I know you have quit music and you are afraid of starting doing music again but we can do again well!

if you want to again the music. please call me, my phone number has not changed yet, since 20years ago.
>> If you want to do music again, please call me. My phone number has not changed yet, since 20 years ago.

Take care, I really miss you.
>> Correct!

Your good frien
>> Correct! 
Or: Your friend

KI[이름] [이름]

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