If a country repeatedly kills innocent civilians while trying to kill terrorists, does that country
학생이 쓴 원문
It is not justifiable for a country or a group to kill or victimize civilians in the name of attacking terrorists or preventing terrors. Civilians’lives cannot be sacrificed for any reasons in any circumstances.Any policies, actions, or laws cannot precede the value of human right. Looking at the history, many governments, in fact, have used terrors as an opportunity to suppress their opponents or to turn public opinion in favor of them to grab power by claiming that they had to do that for the sake of civilians. For example, after the 911 incident in the US, the US government developed the mass surveillance programs to monitor and collect data like people’s email, phone conversation, and search history in the on-line portals to catch terrorists. But their efforts were not only limited to the suspects, but also expanded to almost all citizens, infringing the fundamental right of personal privacy.There is the famous phrase that one man' terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter.
강사 첨삭
Hi there^^
Wow, another serious topic explained in detailed long sentences! This is amazing. I wonder how energetic you are making these sentences.
Well, I do agree with you on your opinion that sometimes others would sacrifice the lives of other people for the sake of their own reputation.
It is such a pity to have this mentality in our society. I do express gratitude to hear these things from you because as a reader of your sentences, I think
you will go places with this kind of ideas. Keep up the good work but be very careful with plurals of nouns and your prepositions.
Take care ^^
T. Nina^^
Here are some of my corrections for you:
It is not justifiable for a country or a group to kill or victimize civilians in the name of attacking terrorists or preventing terrors.
>> It is not justifiable for a country or a group to kill or victimize civilians in the name of terrorists or preventing terrorists to attack.
Civilians’lives cannot be sacrificed for any reasons in any circumstances.
>> Correct.
Any policies, actions, or laws cannot precede the value of human right.
>> Any policies, actions, or laws cannot precede the value of human rights.
Looking at the history, many governments, in fact, have used terrors as an opportunity to suppress their opponents or to turn public opinion in favor of them to grab power by claiming that they had to do that for the sake of civilians.
>> Looking at history, a lot of governments, in fact, have used terrorism as an opportunity to suppress their opponents or to turn public opinion in favor of them to grab power by claiming that they had to do that for the sake of the civilians.
For example, after the 911 incident in the US, the US government developed the mass surveillance programs to monitor and collect data like people’s email, phone conversation, and search history in the on-line portals to catch terrorists.
>> For example, after the 9-11 incident in the US, the US government developed mass surveillance programs to monitor and collect data like people\'s emails, phone conversations, and search history in the on-line portals to catch terrorists.
But their efforts were not only limited to the suspects, but also expanded to almost all citizens, infringing the fundamental right of personal privacy.There is the famous phrase that one man\' terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter.
>> But their efforts were not only limited to the suspects, but also expanded to almost all the citizens, infringing the fundamental rights of personal privacy. There is the famous phrase that one man\'s terrorist is another man\'s freedom fighter.^^
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