If I have a change to change something about my hometown, I would increase a number of schools
학생이 쓴 원문
ESSAY: If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.
If I have a change to change something about my hometown, I would increase a number of schools. The reason why I want to increase a number of schools I would like to make my child have a high quality education.
When I was a elementary school students, there was around fifty students. It means that I did not have good quality education. I believe that smaller is better than larger in term of education quality. So If I have a chance I would increase a number of schools for my child and all of children.
강사 첨삭
Good day Sir JY~! Happy 2nd day of March~! Have a happy Month!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
If I have a change to change something about my hometown, I would increase a number of schools.
>>> If I have a chance to change something about my hometown, I would increase the number of schools.
The reason why I want to increase a number of schools I would like to make my child have a high quality education.
>>> The reason why I want to increase the number of schools is that I would like my child to get a high quality education.
When I was a elementary school students, there was around fifty students.
When I was a elementary school students, there was around fifty students.
>>> When I was an elementary school student, there was around fifty students in our class.
It means that I did not have good quality education.
>>> It means that I did not get quality education.
I believe that smaller is better than larger in term of education quality.
>>> I believe that smaller number is better than a larger one in terms of education quality.
So If I have a chance I would increase a number of schools for my child and all of children.
>>> So, if I have a chance I would increase the number of schools for my child and all of children.
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