If you had a power, what you would do with it?

2015-08-18 · 첨삭 강사 Jamie

학생이 쓴 원문

If I have a power, I will harass people whom I hate. There are many people whom I really abhor. I am eager for their downfall. However, because of the law, I cannot do anything to them. If I have a power that can pass over the law, I will make them passed away.

강사 첨삭

Happy Tuesday, Sung Hoon   How are you doing? Seems that you were carried away by the essay question. I can\'t help myself not to smile at your sentences. ^^ Anyway, I am so happy to know that you are able to make meaningful sentences. Plus, you integrated advanced vocabularies. Wow! All the sentences are related to each other and this is how a good essay must look like. Just look at the corrections provided below. If you have questions, please raise them during our class. See you later. Bye.   ~~T. Jamie^^   If I have a power, I will harass people whom I hate. >> CORRECTThere are many people whom I really abhor. >> CORRECTI am eager for their downfall. >> CORRECT OR: >> I am eager to see their downfall.However, because of the law, I cannot do anything to them. >> CORRECT OR: >> However, because of the law, I cannot do anything bad against them.If I have a power that can pass over the law, I will make them passed away. >> If I have a power that can overthrow or overpower the law, I will make them pass away.

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