If you had a power, what you would do with it?
학생이 쓴 원문
If I have a power, I will harass people whom I hate.
There are many people whom I really abhor.
I am eager for their downfall.
However, because of the law, I cannot do anything to them.
If I have a power that can pass over the law, I will make them passed away.
강사 첨삭
Happy Tuesday, Sung Hoon
How are you doing? Seems that you were carried away by the essay question. I can\'t help myself not to smile at your sentences. ^^
Anyway, I am so happy to know that you are able to make meaningful sentences. Plus, you integrated advanced vocabularies. Wow!
All the sentences are related to each other and this is how a good essay must look like.
Just look at the corrections provided below. If you have questions, please raise them during our class.
See you later. Bye.
~~T. Jamie^^
If I have a power, I will harass people whom I hate.
>> CORRECTThere are many people whom I really abhor.
>> CORRECTI am eager for their downfall.
>> CORRECT
OR:
>> I am eager to see their downfall.However, because of the law, I cannot do anything to them.
>> CORRECT
OR:
>> However, because of the law, I cannot do anything bad against them.If I have a power that can pass over the law, I will make them passed away.
>> If I have a power that can overthrow or overpower the law, I will make them pass away.
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