If you have 1 wish, what you would be and why

2020-04-02 · 첨삭 강사 Tricia

학생이 쓴 원문

Dear Teacher, I want to be a doctor. I think, what I give a medical service ia very important current aociety. Especilly like this Corona outbreak. When I was young, I wished to be a oriental doctor. There was a famous TV drama. Story was about a doctor of Chosun Dynesty. I had a good impressed for the doctor. Now, I worked for medical company. so I have so many chance to meet them. they are very smart. That is why to be a doctor.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]! :)

I appreciate your effort in writing a composition.
Have a wonderful day. :)

- Tricia

Dear Teacher,
>> CORRECT!

I want to be a doctor.
>> CORRECT!
OR>> I would like to be a doctor.

I think, what I give a medical service ia very important current aociety.
>> I think, giving medical services is very important in our current society.

Especilly like this Corona outbreak.
>> Especially. for situations like the Corona outbreak.

When I was young, I wished to be a oriental doctor.
>> When I was young, I wished to be an oriental doctor.

There was a famous TV drama. 
>> CORRECT!

Story was about a doctor of Chosun Dynesty.
>> The story was about a doctor from the Chosun Dynasty.

I had a good impressed for the doctor.
>> I was so impressed by that doctor.

Now, I worked for medical company.
>> Now, I worked for a medical company.

so I have so many chance to meet them.
>> So, I have a lot of chances to meet different doctors.

they are very smart.
>> They are very smart.

That is why to be a doctor.
>> That\'s why I want to be a doctor.

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