In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you thi

2017-07-31 · 첨삭 강사 Rose

학생이 쓴 원문

There might be no doubt rapid urbanization has changed our lives in contrast with past. Especially, the number of people who live alone is increasing dramatically. This change has a beneficial influence on individual life. Firstly, people who live alone can spend their time without other family members’ opinions. They can do what they want freely, so are likely to be satisfied the quality of life. Secondly, people who have much free time can improve their skills. In comparison to people who live with family, they do not need to do household chores for long time because there are few household work. Therefore, they can develop themselves by studying, challenging diverse field and experiencing new culture. In conclusion, we should acknowledge single-person household and encourage them.

강사 첨삭

Thank you very much for doing your homework, [이름]!

Living alone has drawbacks as well as benefits.

Thank you and see you on Wednesday!

There might be no doubt rapid urbanization has changed our lives in contrast with past.

>> There might be no doubt rapid urbanization has changed our lives in contrast with the past.

Especially, the number of people who live alone is increasing dramatically.

>>CORRECT!

This change has a beneficial influence on individual life.

>>This change has a beneficial influence on our individual life.
 Firstly, people who live alone can spend their time without other family members’ opinions.

>>CORRECT!

They can do what they want freely, so are likely to be satisfied the quality of life.

>>CORRECT!
 Secondly, people who have much free time can improve their skills.

>>CORRECT!

In comparison to people who live with family, they do not need to do household chores for long time because there are few household work.

>>In comparison to people who live with family, they do not need to do household chores for a long time because there are few household work.

Therefore, they can develop themselves by studying, challenging diverse field and experiencing new culture.

>>Therefore, they can develop themselves by studying, engaging in a challenging, diverse field and experiencing new culture.

In conclusion, we should acknowledge single-person household and encourage them.

>>CORRECT!

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