In some countries young people are not only richer, but also safer and healthier than ever before. H

2021-01-14 · 첨삭 강사 Gemma

학생이 쓴 원문

This is related with the standard of happiness. Some people think that they are happy even though they are not rich but others feel the emptiness of life because they have everything which everyone envy it such as money, honor and so on. I feel depressed when I achieve my goal. I don\'t know what I have to do next whenever I hit my target. In capitalistic society, rich people can buy anything with their money. They can also keep their health well because they are able to get special treatment from the hospital. Sadly, rich people can access the best hospital with their wealth. We know that people who have power, money and fame always are treated in a different way from the general people. Everyone think that they will be happier if they have have a lot of money but we can find a lot of people in some countries who feel like happy even if their country is not wealthy. Being Happy can achieve with changing our mind and various policies our country have.

강사 첨삭

IMPRESSIVE DAY MR. [이름]~! ^^
The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand.
And the most successful individuals are those who are willing to put in a productive day’s work before they even receive success.
Keep going!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
This is related with the standard of happiness. 
>>> CORRECT
Some people think that they are happy even though they are not rich but others feel the emptiness of life because they have everything which everyone envies such as money, honor and so on.
>>> CORRECT
 I feel depressed when I achieve my goal.
>>> CORRECT
 I don\'t know what I have to do next whenever I hit my target.
>>> CORRECT
 In capitalistic society, rich people can buy anything with their money. 
>>> CORRECT
They can also keep their health well because they are able to get special treatment from the hospital. 
>>> CORRECT
Sadly, rich people can access the best hospital with their wealth. 
>>> CORRECT
We know that people who have power, money and fame are always treated in a different way from the general people.
>>> CORRECT
 Everyone thinks that they will be happier if they have have a lot of money but we can find a lot of people in some countries who are happy even if their country is not wealthy. 
>>> CORRECT
Being Happy can be achieved by changing our mind and various policies our country have.
>>> CORRECT

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