Is it necessary for people to have a hobby? Why?
학생이 쓴 원문
We need a hobby to improve our life. I mean human is going to do something constantly to avoid being sick of life. To make life more attractive, we need to refresh every certain period of time. In addition, having a hobby gives us a way to stress out. We have to release our stresses getting from work, relationship or something. If we didn’t do that, we wouldn’t stand for living in hard life. So, a hobby is one of the most important thing in our life. Try anything whatever you want.
강사 첨삭
Thank you for this Yoon!
We need a hobby to improve our life.
>> correct
>> OR: We need a hobby to improve our lives.
I mean human is going to do something constantly to avoid being sick of life.
>> I mean, humans need to do something constantly to avoid being sick of life.
To make life more attractive, we need to refresh every certain period of time.
>> correct
>> OR: To make life more attractive, we need to do something refreshing every certain period of time.
>> OR: To make life more attractive, we need to keep doing something new every certain period of time.
In addition, having a hobby gives us a way to stress out.
>> In addition, having a hobby gives us a way to relieve/release stress.
We have to release our stresses getting from work, relationship or something.
>> We have to release our stresses taken/accumulated from work, relationship or something.
If we didn’t do that, we wouldn’t stand for living in hard life.
>> If we didn’t do that, we wouldn’t stand living a hard life.
So, a hobby is one of the most important things in our life.
>> correct
Try anything, whatever you want.
>> correct
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