: It is impossible to help all people around the world in need so governments should focus on people

2021-05-13 · 첨삭 강사 Gemma

학생이 쓴 원문

I think that poverty happen from the human desire which want to have more money. There are two type of government in the world which are communism and democracy decided by each country. Some European county have adapted social democracy. We can solve the poverty problem by implementing proper social system according to the country\'s culture and system. As I know, there are a lot of social group to help poor people around the world and local. However, many people have raised the issues which need to get aids from their government. They want their government to help them instead of helping people other countries even if they are poorer than local people. The charity foundation make the advertisement that we can save the world if we don\'t drink a cup of coffee every day because people in Africa need food and small money is worth for them. I know these activities are important and helpful for people who are under the poverty but I want to help local people first and then approach oth

강사 첨삭

Happy Thursday Mr. [이름]! How are you today? Are you still busy with your patient? Well, I guess yes because you\'re the most important person in your department! kkk See you tomorrow!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think that poverty happen from the human desire which want to have more money. 
>>> I think poverty happens from human\'s desire which want to have more money. 
There are two type of government in the world which are communism and democracy decided by each country. 
>>> There are two types of governments in the world which are communism and democracy depending on each country. 
Some European county have adapted social democracy. 
>>> Some European countries have adapted social democracy. 
We can solve the poverty problem by implementing proper social system according to the country\'s culture and system. 
>>> We can solve the poverty problem by implementing a proper social system according to the country\'s culture and system. 
As I know, there are a lot of social group to help poor people around the world and local.
>>> As I know, there are a lot of social groups to help poor people around the world and local.
 However, many people have raised the issues which need to get aids from their government. 
>>> CORRECT
They want their government to help them instead of helping people other countries even if they are poorer than local people. 
>>> They want their government to help them instead of helping people from other countries even if they are poorer than local people. 
he charity foundation make the advertisement that we can save the world if we don\'t drink a cup of coffee every day because people in Africa need food and small money is worth for them. 
>>> Charity foundations make the advertisement that we can save the world if we don\'t drink a cup of coffee every day because people in Africa need food and small money is worth for them. 
I know these activities are important and helpful for people who are under the poverty but I want to help local people first and then approach oth
>>> I know these activities are important and helpful for people who are under poverty but I want to help local people first and then approach others.

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