Japanese Life 3

2017-02-20 · 첨삭 강사 Lynn

학생이 쓴 원문

On third day, we went to the yaki curry restaurant 'Princess Phiphi' that we had been not able to go yesterday because it had been closed. It was famous for yaki curry. So, we ordered two that curries of which one was basic and the other was mixed with fresh seafood. To eat dessert directly, we additionally ordered it too. The curries we ate for the first time made us enchanted. So, we managed to escape from these taste. After getting out of it, we went to our another accommodation in Yufuin by Japanese railroad. Frankly, our second accommodation was very expensive. To put it plainly, the expense we paid for it maybe amounted to 570$ for two nights. Why was the place expensive? First, it was very broad, about 30 square meters. And it was made up of a individual hot spring, two washstands, a Japanese floor mat, fancy lights and so on. As soon as we looked at them, we couldn't not help be excited and our mouths had big gaps.

강사 첨삭

Hi there [이름]!
I\'m sure although you have been recently to Japan, you\'d like to go back there. It is evident by your stories and how excited you are to tell them. I hope you\'d be back there soon.
Take care!
~T. Lynn
On third day, we went to the yaki curry restaurant \'Princess Phiphi\' that we had been not able to go yesterday because it had been closed.
>> On  the third day, we went to the yaki curry restaurant  called \'Princess Phiphi\' that we had  not been able to go to yesterday because it had been closed.
It was famous for yaki curry.
>> correct!
So, we ordered two that curries of which one was basic and the other was mixed with fresh seafood.
>> So, we ordered two,  one of which was basic and the other was mixed with fresh seafood.
To eat dessert directly, we additionally ordered it too.
>> We also ordered dessert because we want to eat it immediately.
The curries we ate for the first time made us enchanted.
>> correct!
So, we managed to escape from these taste.
>> correct!
After getting out of it, we went to our another accommodation in Yufuin by Japanese railroad.
>> After eating, we  went to our accommodation in Yufuin  near the Japanese railroad.
Frankly, our second accommodation was very expensive.
>> correct!
To put it plainly, the expense we paid for it maybe amounted to 570$ for two nights.
>> To put it plainly, the expenses we paid for it amounted to maybe $570 for two nights.
Why was the place expensive?
>> correct!
First, it was very broad, about 30 square meters.
>> First, it was very wide/big, about 30 square meters.
And it was made up of a individual hot spring, two washstands, a Japanese floor mat, fancy lights and so on.
>> correct!
As soon as we looked at them, we couldn\'t not help be excited and our mouths had big gaps.
>> Soon as we looked at them, we couldn\'t not help not to be excited as we gape at it.

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