Journal

It is sometimes difficult to recognize what I feel. I used to be emotionally numb. There are some reasons. I recently learned that my trauma has made me deny or ignore exploring my primary emotions. It is because painful experiences and trauma are too heavy to deal with or cope with. It has become my emotional patterns. I subconsciously have avoided dealing with my young-self. I didn\'t want to accept the reality and behind stories. I must be brave and courageous to explore and look at the reality of my past, especially traumatic experiences from my relationships and family. Powerlessness, grief, abandonment, inferiority, emptiness, disappointment, littleness, loneliness, etc. All those emotions are under sadness. I lift them up to my Lord for healing and recovery from His original blessings. Jesus knew and experienced those emotions when he was abandoned and died on the cross. But He resurrected from death. I pray that I also experience and live out the power of resurrection. Amen!