June 16, 2020 Homework
학생이 쓴 원문
ESSAY: Nowadays there is an increase in social problems involving young people because more parents spent time at work than with their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
I generally agree with this opinion. Because most parents have to work many times for their living, they can’t spent time with their children. I think these parents needs government’s support and government has to make laws to help these parents. For example, Korea government make some laws for parenting, maternity leave system for fathers, children care support fund, parental leave, something like that. I think many children are influenced by their parents with many parts. That’s reason, parents have to try to spend a lot of times with their children.
강사 첨삭
Hi Sir James~! Thank you for doing your homework~ ^^ Focus on good thoughts and good things will happen. Happy Wednesday stay positive. Think positive. Do positive.
Have a wonderful day~!^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I generally agree with this opinion.
>>> CORRECT
Because most parents have to work hard for their living. They can’t spent time with their children.
>>> CORRECT
I think these parents needs government’s support and government has to make laws to help these parents.
>>> I think these parents need the government’s support and it has to make laws to help working parents.
For example, Korea government make some laws for parenting, maternity leave system for fathers, children care support fund, parental leave, something like that.
>>> For example, Korea government make some laws for parenting, paternity leave system for fathers, children care support fund, parental leave, something like that.
I think many children are influenced by their parents with many parts.
>>> I think children are influenced by their parents in many ways.
That’s reason, parents have to try to spend a lot of times with their children.
>>> That’s the reason why parents have to try to spend a lot of time with their children.
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