Live to the point of tears
학생이 쓴 원문
My husband might grieve after noticing that he don't need to have two coffees. Who could find a piece of Lego which my son have lost? Only I know it where it is. Thanks to a year as bonus, I enjoyed the happiness that I walked my son for his first day at school. It was so happy when I bought my son a bicicyle to congratulate on extracting his first wobbly tooth. I have lived to my late 30s not middle 30s due to a year bonus. I wish to have a middle-age spreading of belly, expanding waist and graying hair. I want to pick out my gray hair because that means I live long enough. I wish to get old. I hope everyone enjoy the life and keep a tight grip on your life with both hands. I envy you. Please live to the point of tears. Thank you for reading to the end!!
강사 첨삭
Dear [Name]. [이름],
A encouraging day to us! ^.^
Happy Monday! ^^
To start, let me thank you for continuing your sharing about the courageous mother of two kids and the loving wife of a lucky man.
I am so moved by your sharing.
I know I can\'t do anything for her and her family but only pray for them.
I know she is already in the garden of heaven.
Suddenly, I envy her, but my time will come.
All of us, our time will come, and we should be happy because we still have a lot of time to live to the point of tears.
I will do it surely. ^^
Anyway, that\'s all for now! ^^,
Happy reading! ^^.
See you very soon! ^.^
... Teacher Paula ... ^.~
My husband might grieve after noticing that he don\'t need to have two coffees.
>> My husband might grieve after noticing that he doesn\'t need to have two cups of coffee. (DON\'T should be DOESN\'T since the subject in the clause is HE. It is better to say TWO CUPS OF COFFEE rather than saying TWO COFFEES.)
>> BETTER: My husband might grieve after noticing that he won\'t have two cups of coffee.
Who could find a piece of Lego which my son have lost?
>> Who could find a piece of Lego which my son has lost? (HAVE should be HAS.)
Only I know it where it is.
>> IT IS BETTER TO SAY: I am the only person who knows where it is.
Thanks to a year as bonus, I enjoyed the happiness that I walked my son for his first day at school.
>> CORRECT!
It was so happy when I bought my son a bicicyle to congratulate on extracting his first wobbly tooth.
>> I THINK WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY IS: I was so happy when I bought my son a bicycle to congratulate him on his first tooth wobbly extraction.
>> OR: It was a really happy moment when I bought my son a bicycle to congratulate him on his first tooth wobbly extraction.
I have lived to my late 30s not middle 30s due to a year bonus.
>> I have lived in my late 30s not middle 30s due to a year bonus. (PATTERN: in someone\'s 30s)
I wish to have a middle-age spreading of belly, expanding waist and graying hair.
>> IT IS BETTER TO SAY: I wish to have a middle age spreading of belly, expanding of waist and graying of hair.)
I want to pick out my gray hair because that means I live long enough.
>> CORRECT!
>> OR: I want to pick my gray hair out, because that means I live long enough.
I wish to get old.
>> CORRECT!
>> OR: I wish to get older.
I hope everyone enjoy the life and keep a tight grip on your life with both hands.
>> I hope everyone enjoys life and keeps a tight grip on your life with both hands. (EVERYONE is considered as a Singular Noun, so ENJOY should be in its Singular form. Therefore, ENJOY should be ENJOYS.)
I envy you.
>> CORRECT!
Please live to the point of tears.
>> CORRECT!
Thank you for reading to the end!!
>> CORRECT!
>> BETTER: Thank you for read until the end!
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